


Here Comes The Sun

by ManyFandomsAreOut



Category: The Beatles (Band)
Genre: M/M, McLennon, Period Typical Bigotry, Period-Typical Homophobia, crossoverwithpolyqueen, polybeatles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:21:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25998193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ManyFandomsAreOut/pseuds/ManyFandomsAreOut
Summary: This story entails the ins and outs of quite a turbulent polyamorous relationship between The Beatles. Especially in a time where dating even one of their fellow male band members was illegal, This story details how this scary reality can breed a a whole new sunny optimism.(SET IN THE SAME UNIVERSE AS MY POLY QUEEN FIC 'Love Me Like There's No Tomorrow' MAY MAKE LINKS FURTHER INTO THE STORY)
Relationships: George Harrison & John Lennon, George Harrison & John Lennon & Paul McCartney & Ringo Starr, George Harrison & Paul McCartney, George Harrison/Ringo Starr, John Lennon & Ringo Starr, John Lennon/Paul McCartney, Paul McCartney & Ringo Starr, The Beatles & The Beatles, mcstarr
Comments: 3
Kudos: 12





	1. Beatlemania

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Beatles had become a worldwide phenomenon...but no one knew them just as well as they thought they did.

The Beatles had gripped the industry by storm, the world was in an absolute rage over the four young men, the press labelled it Beatlemania. Every woman across the globe swarmed at a chance to see the four scousers perform...or even just exist.

———

As many fanbases would do in the many years after they were very much branded by one personality trait that gave girls an easy way to define which Beatle they found completely to die for.

Paul was the cute one, due to his soft features and droopy doe eyes he was a very definable cute member of the group; it was very easy for McCartney to make the ladies swoon with a simple smile.

John was the labelled the cheeky Beatle or perhaps in others eyes the smart Beatle. This varied from girl to girl as some beatlemaniacs were raised to repulse against the bad boy cheeky stereotype; settling instead for the ideology that John was incredibly intelligent, his cheeky/witty comments making the girls squeal with excitement.

Ringo was deemed the funny one, this may have been because in many bits of Beatles media that each of the band members stared in, Starr was often either the butt of the joke or the focus of a conversation when it came to looks. His jokes within these moments cementing him as the comedic Beatle; causing the girls to giggle themselves into a frenzy.

Last but certainly not least was George. George was proclaimed as the quiet Beatle as his phrases and words were short and usually quite tongue and cheek. His mysterious yet joyful nature led most girls to swoon over just the sight of his face.

——-

These observations however did not fully describe The Beatles in ways they saw fit, they didn't even come close to nailing any aspect of their personality besides face value opinion.

Paul loved being called cute, that was definitely not a pet peeve of the bassist however he was annoyed when people ended up basically babying him because of it. He did feel sexual things and he did have sexual needs and desires and for some unbeknownst reason everyone simply refused to acknowledge that; in all the skits they'd been in John, Ringo and even George were seen taking an open sexual interest in the women whilst he remained the responsible adorable one.

John was very emotionally vulnerable, he suffered from what many would deem as quite a Rocky childhood. The actions of his parents and parental figures led Lennon to hold quite a lot of residual anger in which he physically didn't know how to express. The witty and cheeky comments were simply a facade to cover up the fact that John was one word away from either crumbling to pieces or lashing out in anger.

Ringo wanted to be desired, he was tired of his only defining feature being his comedic personality as the girls for some reason couldn't find away to swoon over him, it was only made worse when skit and script writers would emphasise his insecurities for all to see. Starr simply wanted someone to look at him and not just laugh at his jokes but also long for his heart.

George was very unsure as to how he obtained the title of the quiet one due to the fact that in every day life he was actually quite outspoken. He could natter someone's ear off if given the chance. He wished people would stop simply labelling him as mysterious and quiet before even getting to know him.  
——-

Each of The Beatles also suffered from a particular conflict, the law, society....and their desire for men.

Paul couldn't help but swoon in silence when a male news reporter would read out some of the letters from female fans. He would relish in the secretive lustful glances thrown by closeted men as they locked eyes on the street. He wasn't that annoyed by the fact he couldn't be perceived as lustful to women, it was merely the fact that his existence was illegal.

John didn't grow up around many men and the one father figure he did have passed in his teen developmental years. Hearing all of the fake philosophies of the time, John truly believed for a short period that it was his female centric childhood that caused him to develop a lust for men. He did learn to accept it but for the sake of his own safety became heavily offended when someone would even hint toward him being homosexual. This usually worked but also became a funnel for him to take out his anger in a very unhealthy way.

Ringo had decided to live in a blissful ignorance of sorts. He knew the law and he knew the societal opinion and despite staying silent on the matter for his own safety he very much saw nothing wrong with his attraction to men. Ringo's troubles seemed to start when he felt the extreme need to express and talk about his feeling whilst being unable to do so.

George hated himself, it was the one aspect of his life he could not stand however sometimes he couldn't help but indulge in it. A main example of George's anguish was when he found it impossible to get off to women, just thinking about women made him go soft. This caused the man shame enough as is, this was only aggravated after he finally caved and got himself off at the thought of being ravished by a man, he couldn't stop crying into his pillow that night whilst trying to ask anyone in the whole wide universe for some form of forgiveness.

——

So whilst Beatlemania gripped the globe and infected the minds of all women alike. 

A different type of Beatlemania and desires to express it plagued the minds of the actual Beatles, causing rehearsals and recordings to carry just a bit  
More extra tension and fear.

It was the start of an era but seemingly to each of the men, the end of their dignity.


	2. Misery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After accidentally revealing their sexualities in a moment of admiration. The band try and find their feet with such a new concept of security.

Out and proud wasn't exactly an option for The Beatles, or for any man of their time for that manner. Despite their absolutely skyrocketed career as a band such a subject would not only derail their career but furthermore there lives.

This was the though that practically bounced off the sides of Paul's brain as he mindlessly plucked at his bass, John on the bed beside him looking up to the ceiling as if it had all the answers to life scrawled across it.

"The world is treating me bad John" Paul stated with a sigh as he stopped plucking and put his bass to the side.

"I get it Macca...misery" John states in his blank haze before he sat up with wide eyes. "Write that down Paul write it down!" Lennon exclaimed as a song idea sprung to mind. 

Paul practically jumped from his spot to grab the pen and paper from the bedside table, scrawling the words in which they didn't directly reference each other to start the scraps of a song.

It wasn't actually uncommon for the pair to write songs sat in either Paul or Johns bed, for some reason the intimacy sparked some sort of creative passion between the pair, they however couldn't seem to put a pin in it.

——-  
"Okay so how was that?" Ringo asked as he finished recording the drums for John and Paul's latest creation, George sat silently in the corner as they waited for feedback.

"Absolutely cracking Ringo as always!" Paul praised the drummer as John smiled beside him. 

John then went to move toward the record player, he pulled out a record from the self and set it playing...Elvis. "Enough of our stuff we need to unwind let's dance!" John laughed before closing his eyes and dancing along with the music.

Paul was an absolute sucker for Elvis so he began to bop to the beat whilst clicking along the beat, Ringo dancing beside him, even George tapped his feet to the beat as he sat mostly spaced out expressionless in the corner.

"I do love a bit of Elvis" Ringo stated as they all jived to the beat, swaying and moving the music. The stress of getting the songs to a quality level flowing away with each sultry note from Elvis' mouth.

"Oh yeah I think he's dead sexy" Paul blurted out his reply before he even go chance to think about it. It was quite literally a record scratch moment as John stopped the record, McCartney's eyes widening with fear.

He was completely outnumbered he had no chance, if the band decided in that moment they wanted to kick him out of the band or even worse beat him senseless, there would be no one around to stop them. Tears began to well in the bassists eyes as the moment of silence seemed to last forever.

"You okay Macca?" John asked as he walked over to Paul, placing a hand on his shoulder; Paul flinching our of fear as a response. "don't worry Paul...I think Elvis dead fit too" Lennon stated before looking to George and Ringo; at least if the other pair were homophobic, Paul would have chance of not being beaten to a pulp.

"Well since were all being so open, I think Elvis is smokinnn" Ringo laughed with tears brimming in his eyes as John and Paul pulled him in for a hug. The mutters and sighs of relief stopped when they pulled apart and realised that George had left.

They stood for a moment taking the realisation and the wait of what they had all basically admitted to eachother, despite being afraid to actually utter the words out loud. In other words the panic set in.

“Shit I can’t believe I fucking admitted it out loud!” Ringo almost yelled out in exclamation as the three sat swiftly down to try and ground themselves.

“Do you think George is going to tell?” Paul asked as he remembered him leaving the room, fear spread among the trio as they tried to assure themselves that George would never do something like that.

———

Meanwhile George sat crying in the studio bathroom, tears cascading down his face as he poured his emotions out into the he empty room.

He felt so conflicted, he wasn’t supposed to like gay people...all of his friends were gay people...but he didn’t want to hate his friends and if he didn’t hate his friends why should he hate himself; the contradictions of heart and mind drove George crazy as he tried to calm himself down .

———

George came back into the room much later and all of the band let out a sigh of relief, Glad he hadn’t just run off to blab their illegal secrets. “You okay Hazza?” John asked as he saw the mans tears stained cheeks.

“Yeah, fine...I don’t really want to talk about it” George explained as he crossed the room, picking up his instrument, “shall we get back to recording?” He asked; the rest of the men complied.

They all perhaps knew deep down that George was having an intense battle with his identity; all of the other men had experienced that conflict in their journey of discovery, people like John still completely dismissing that he was simply born that way and still trying to find an explanation. 

They all knew however with the delicate nature of such a miserable subject it was best to wait for George to talk to them, or ask them questions. They knew that self discovery jumbled up with breaking the law and running the risk of losing your life was not something to be decided lightly. 

They were just glad they knew that they had a stable environment to be their illegal selves, for once being able to be proud; even the littlest amount of pride within that moment was enough to brighten their experience for the rest of their lives. 

And in such a desperate time who wouldn’t be willing to settle for such a simple thing.


	3. The Lennon-McCartney Writing Partnership

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After basically admitting their deepest darkest secrets as a band, John and Paul have some more lustful issues to face in private

Each of the band members, whether they accepted their sexuality or not, appreciated having a safe haven with each other in which they could be their authentic selves. Even talk about boys! What they weren't ready for was the fully realised sexual tension, the two people feeling the brunt of this being Paul and John.

——-

Paul and John had always written together, they'd always gone to one or the others house to sit and write their latest hit. Yet with the knowledge they both liked men the tension seemed to rise between the pair. Affectionate things they used to do before like make each other tea, hug and even compliments, now seemed to have an added sense of sexual tension on the other end of them.

Paul would glance at John whole he was writing, admiring the focused look on his furrowed brow or the way he would smirk when he thought of something particularly funny. He thought it was annoying yet endearing when John tried to read something without his glasses; squinting as if that would stop him from being unable to see. These moments would only last until Lennon looked up, to which McCartney would swiftly look away.

John loved to eat Paul up with his eyes. The way McCartneys focused doe eyes skimmed across his notepad as he looked over his lyrics, the way in which he'd giggle at some of Johns jokes, the way in which his eyes and nose scrunched up when he did so. Just as Paul had realised, John only let the moments last whilst the bassist wasn't looking; the glances thrown his way being mostly stolen before he got the chance to look up and acknowledge them.

That was until John looked up to see Paul giving him the same heart eyed glances he'd been giving the bassist without him realising. The two of them broke into a furious blush.

Paul made a step of bravery, he moved his hand so it would brush lightly against Johns, Johns breath caught in his throat as Paul did so.

That's when Paul mustered up enough courage to pull John in for a kiss, as kiss that was laced with not only lust but also acute fear; fear that Lennon would recoil, making some comment about 'just because Im a queer...it doesn't mean I like you!'.

This fear was quickly fizzled by the way that John furthered the kiss, Lennon gripped onto McCartney quite aggressively as they tried to pull each other as close together as they could. They seemed to fit together in a warm and passionate kiss before pulling away breathless.

They both stared at each other like frightened puppies, unaware and afraid of what they were supposed to say next. Both very much wanting to say something but not seeming to be able to find the right words.

"If we did this whenever we write no one will know" John quickly blurted out as he held Paul's hand in his.

"You could me mine love...what'dya say?"John moved his hand to hold Paul's face, the bassist furiously blushing into Lennon's touch.

"I'd say it sounds like a crackin idea"' McCartney agreed as he leaned in to kiss Lennon once more; they felt each other grinning against the kiss as they did so in some sort of belated happy bliss.

——-

Being in the studio after that wasn't awkward per say but it was most definitely difficult.

Paul wanted to snuggle close into Johns arms and John wanted to hold onto Paul every chance he got however all they could do was limited to a few quick sensual glances.

John went as far as slapping Paul's ass quickly when the rest of the band went out the room for a brief moment; the bassists face erupting into a smitten and a slightly aroused blush before composing himself to carry on playing on the track.

————

They decided one night to have a sleepover, they'd had many in their friendship and no one ever questioned when they slept in the same bed as it was something they had always done.

Paul took this opportunity to snuggle closely to Johns chest, Lennon stroked circles into McCartneys back as they held each other tighter than they ever had before. Paul would go as far as to plant a kiss on Johns lips after moving some hair out of his face to let him know how much he was truly loved. Of course that word could not be said.

Love was a fearful thing, queer love was borderline traumatically fearful for men of their time, they felt okay with their sexualities overall but they feared the consequences of expressing such passion and affection anywhere. They were glad to have such a private place where three could dote such affections onto each other but they knew fully expressing it may prove quite difficult for the pair.

They hadn’t even said the word boyfriend out loud, there was so much shame surrounding it it made the pair of them feel like criminals; though in the eyes of the law that’s exactly what they where, criminals. 

As the pair fell asleep close together in each other’s arms they dreamed of the day in which they could show their love in public, even declare it to fans. Minds drifting to an almost impossible timeline in which the pair could kiss in public without being arrested.

From their perspective that day would never come, yet when they dreamed of growing old...since they were younger, they had always dreamed of growing old together. Both of them collectively decided to ignore the itch in their mind that included Ringo and George in their gentle loving bliss; it was simply to much to unpack and too illegal to fathom. 

They instead cherished what they had, and were grateful they could at least hold each other in private fearing the heartache they would face if they didn’t.


	4. Shorter than I thought you were

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A moment of spontaneous passion leaves some of the band in quite an emotional dilemma.

At the height of Beatlemania the band had reached they had to spend most of their social time inside, some of those meetings often ended in some form of petty debate.

——

"I can't believe this!" Ringo exclaimed, causing Paul to look up from his book. The drummer was flicking through a woman's magazine and was apparently very angry at what he had just read.

"What's got your knickers in a twist?" Paul asked as he put his book down, desperately wanting an answer as to why Ringo was so vehemently angry over a women's magazine.

"This woman who gave a review of a Beatles concert called me short....I SIT DOWN THE WHOLE TIME MACCA!" Ringo exclaimed as he threw the magazine at Paul, the bassist barely dodging it as it was lobbed in his general direction.

"But Ringo...you are short" Paul loved to get Ringo riled up, not actually angry of course and he would stop if he saw the drummer become genuinely distressed over his teasing; but at that current moment he enjoyed the way he teased Starr.

"I'm fuckin not!" Starr stood up with a aggressive defiance, eager to prove something that wouldn't usually bother him as much as it had that day.

This argument was diminished however when Paul stood up and walked over to him, getting so close he could feel his breath. "I think you are love" Paul taunted, his and Ringo's eyes widening.

Paul called a lot of women love, it was Paul's term of endearment however he had never said it to a man; at least from Ringo's perspective. This made the drummer quite immediately smitten, his body feeling weak, especially when he stood so close to the equally flustered bassist.

Yet as Paul looked down slightly at Ringo he couldn't help but feel quite a conflict whirring around in his mind, of course he recognised the feeling he got from standing so close to the drummer only an idiot wouldn't.

However he knew that dating one man was enough to get you arrested, or if the other man found out, broken hearted. 

However Ringo did not see this conflict, he only saw lust as he pulled on the collar of Paul's shirt bringing him down for a passionate yet short kiss, Paul kissed back at first. He put his hands on either side of Ringo's face as he kissed him with extreme fervour.

However his conflict caused him to pull back with a sudden jolt, the fear in his eyes easily conveyed to the drummer as regret as McCartney ran from the room. Leaving the anxious drummer startled and frozen in the doorway

——-

It didn't take long for Paul to find Johns hotel room, he burst in with extreme worry painted along his face. Lennon looked up to see who had just burst into his room; worrying about the breach of security until he saw the expression on Paul's face.

"What's wrong Macca?" John asked as he rushed over to Paul who was leaning against the door that just closed behind him.

"You promise you won't be mad?" Paul could feel tears and fear brewing and threatening to spill over and it cause him to go into an extreme shiver as he tried desperately to battle his emotions.

"Promise"John agreed as he took hold of Paul's shaking hands, he wondered what had got the man so worked up as he held onto him tightly; Paul still trying to put his words together.

"Ringo kissed me...and I kissed back" Paul pulled his hands away in a flinching fear that John would become violent. This made Johns heart ache however his mind did wander over the words he'd just said.

He'd often imagined not only him kissing Ringo but he'd borderline fantasised about Paul kissing Ringo, it could go exactly the way John wanted if Ringo also had feelings for him too. "That's okay, that's fine okay I love you Paul and you know that" John reassures the bassist out loud.

Both their eyes widened when he realised he'd made such an admission out loud. They'd perhaps been officially dating for a month or so and there was no real gage ,especially in their circumstances, when the time was right. This admission sent a warm shiver through Paul's body as a blush filled his cheeks. "I love you too John" Paul expressed bashfully as his tears spilled over; instead of being anxious tears, the tears cascading down his face were instead filled with an overwhelming relieve and joy.

"But do you also like Ringo...it's fine if you do because...I do too" John admitted as he took Paul's hands in his, the two of them sharing a large amount of intimate vulnerability at that moment.

“I think...I think I do” Paul replies hesitantly as John pulled him close; the amount of general fear for their safety couldn’t be brushed from his mind by even the sweetest of declarations, but he took comfort in the warmth of Johns chest.

“Oh Ringo! I left him on his own!” The bassist exclaimed as he and shared a look of panic before the pair swirly ran out of the room to run back to Ringo.

——-

When Paul and John burst into Ringo’s room they found the drummer sat on the floor with his head in his hands, small and hidden sobs leaving his lips as he tried to be as quiet as possible so no one would notice.

“Ringo...I’m dead sorry I ran off like that love” Paul crouched down to join Ringo on the floor. He used that word again that made Ringo feel all warm and happy; it did a small part in making the drummer look up to face the endearing bassist.

“Do you like me like that Ringo?” He asked as he took the drummers hand in his, trying to indicate that he did like him and it was completely okay for Ringo to admit that.

“Yes...yes...since I joined really” Ringo admitted as he managed to hold a vulnerable yet comforting eye contact with Paul, before looking over to John who smiled at him with earnest.

“I don’t know if you’ll be grossed out by this...but I like you too” Ringo explained to John and oh boy the man was sure he was flying after hearing the drummers confession.

“I’m not grossed out by it at all Ringo...that actually why I came” John smiled as he took Ringo’s hands in his just as he had done with Paul’s. “Kiss me?” Lennon suggested as he moved closer, Starr wasting no time in pulling him in for a deep kiss; McCartney only just discovering how adorable and sexy it was to watch. 

——-  
“So what do we do about this?” Ringo asked much later as they all laid sprawled out on the hotel room floor. Paul and John technically hadn’t even admitted they were dating out loud despite verbally confessing their love they’d never used the words.

“Well Paul is my boyfriend” John pushed the words from his mouth, trying to ignore the paranoia that clouded his brain that someone may be listening as he poured his heart out. Paul smiled widely with bashful eyes as he too tried to cover up the ever-looming paranoia. 

“Yeah an Johns my boyfriend...I do suppose you could be our boyfriend Ringo...if you really wanted to?” Paul suggested as he tried his best to also get his words out. 

“So we all date...eachother?” Ringo asked for clarification as he laid smiling between the anxious pair.

“Well that sounds like the right way to do it...but we only show affection when we’re alone of course love” Paul explained the basis of the rules to Ringo who very quickly understood; it was illegal after all.

“Well fancy that...most sought after men in the world and were dating each other” John began to laugh as they all sat and laughed over the concept of the obsessive Beatlemania. 

Even if it was only in the privacy of their own company the trio very much appreciated being able to be as authentic as they possibly could; freed by their shared love but trapped by now knowing what that affectionate freedom feels like.


	5. We’ll never do it in front of you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> George walks in and finds the new romantic trio in a slightly compromising situation. This starts the beginning of a long inner battle between the guitarists desires and the guitarist societal beliefs

Though Ringo, Paul and John has managed thus far to keep their general affection under wraps, the drummer growing accustomed to the casual stolen kiss before someone walked in the room, much like the other two had before including him in their fun.  
None of them however could cope with their unwavering crush on George. The guitarist however made that crush quiet difficult at times.

——-  
George was actually on time to the studio, something he hadn't been for a couple of months. He was shocked however to hear the sounds of Paul some what whining. He stormed in before the three other band members could get chance to pull apart and he was met with a sight that at first glance made him gag but when thinking about it turned him on to the point of no return.

He saw Paul pinned against the wall by John who was kissing against his neck, Ringo trying his best and holding onto the bassist so that he could cover the other side; McCartney clutching to the wall so he wouldn't cry out in bliss. It definitely was a sight to behold.

The first emotion that clouded George's brain was disgust, they shouldn't be doing such a thing it was vile and sinful and downright wrong! However he couldn't stop the part of his brain that desperately wanted to have Ringo pressed against him, kissing at his neck as opposed to him fighting for a spot against Paul.

These thoughts were quickly dashed and overcome once more by the waves of disgust and guilt; he didn't want to feel the way he felt. He couldn't stand the feeling of warmth that spread through his chest seeing the three in such a tender yet lustful position.

The whole time George battled with his thoughts, John, Paul and Ringo has jumped apart all of them stood fearful like a dear in headlights as they waited for George to speak. This however was replaced by Paul standing strongly forward.

"Listen here George...I really know you may not like this and we know this is illegal, but please" Paul reaches behind him so that Ringo and John would each take his hand; both trying their best to stand beside him, trying to echo the same sort of foolish bravery. "Please George we love each other very much...I promise you we'll never do it in front of you if you don't want but please don't tell anyone" Paul at that point couldn't tell if he was demanding or begging at that point, the fear in his voice probably swaying more towards the latter.

George's mind wandered over what he actually wanted to say after Paul's declaration. It and all been so sudden. He hadn't even noticed the whole time they'd been doing such things. Part of him was glad that they offered to do it out of his sight and yet part of him wondered if he was only glad they'd be out of his sight because they were doing it without him. The thought of doing it however only filled him with immense shame as he looked up at the trio.

"Just...don't do it in front of me" George managed to choke the words out, followed by an echoed sigh of relief among the trio opposite. All of which where slightly dazed by the fact that he hadn’t started into a shocked rage; still trying to deal with their useless crush on the guy as he told them not to express any love around him.

______

That night George thought about the rest of the band in a way he hadn’t usually; he also though about his opinions on a certain subject in a way he hadn’t usually.

He noticed the way Paul’s eyes dropped in a doe like way, his sweet smile always lighting up the room and making him fuzzy in an emotion beyond happiness. He recalled the small affectionate ways Ringo would check in on him and hold onto him, always making him feel close and wanted when he felt really rough. He couldn’t help but think back upon all the times John had put his arm round him, pulled him close under the guise of a joke. 

Thinking about his band members in such a way would usually immediately make him sick to the stomach with guilt and disgust however Paul’s words seem to stick in his mind, “We’ll never do it in front of you” it provided the option of secrecy, intimacy, stability...all away from societal judgement. George almost laughed at the idea that to them in that moment he was the societal judgment he worried about when he thoughts crippled him.

Perhaps in private the notion of wanting to kiss a man may not actually appear as sinful as they would in public; no one would ever know...who’s to say it even happened.

He remembered the tender way John and Ringo gripped onto Paul as he spoke, he’d have to put his self loathing and disgust aside to see that light shine in their eyes. 

————

“Hey guys...I just need to say something” George stayed as they all got ready to begin; Paul helping Ringo set up his drums and trying his hardest not to kiss him or even go near him at all the whole time.

“What is it Hazza?” John buzzed George’s nickname as he sat on the nearest chair to sit and listen to George’s declaration.

“I don’t mind if you guys want to...kiss in the studio or...hug or hold hands... I know you don’t have that many places you can” George stated as he dodged all eye contact, trying desperately to avoid all of his issues threatening to spill from his mouth at once.

“Oh George I’m so happy I could kiss you! But I guess Ringo will do” Paul laughed before pulling the drummer into a soft yet short kiss; not wanting to make the young guitarist step too far from his comfort zone.

Though George may not have realised it; the rest of the band could see that he had finally started to take the perilous journey any LGBT person of the time had to make, a road to acceptance. This was easier said than done when George was only partially edging towards the first step in the journey, accepting himself. However the rest of the band knew with enough support he may just realise his existence wasn’t a disgusting disgrace.


	6. Distant yet close

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> George’s newly realised crush on men starts a spiral of his internal panic.
> 
> *TW: Homophobic language*

It was weird for the trio couple to be able to kiss or hug or even hold hands in front of someone not in the relationship. They had been quite fearful of it before especially with the combining factor of their crush on George and his original reluctance to even let them do it. Yet in time much to George's unfortunate and rising discomfort, they found it slot easier.

——-

"For god sake John did you hide my soddin bass?" Paul asked as he searched round the studio trying to look in all nooks and crannies, concave and storable parts of the room. 

"I would never do such a thing, Ringo on the other hand!" John exclaimed, Ringo letting out a hurried laughter as Lennon ran up behind him and captured him in a hug; a fated disguise used so that he could be tickled into an oblivion. The tickle fight soon resulting in the two locking lips for a few fleeting moments before pulling away and softly meeting each other's eyes; the fresh and new found love between the two blaring warmly between their looks.

It felt strange because for a moment George could swear he felt some type of jealousy. Not that the minded the boys kissing but for a fleeting moment he actually thought about John capturing him in such a kiss; it sent a bashful blush across his cheeks as he desperately tried to hide how flustered and warm he felt. Only feeling worse when he looked over to Paul.

Paul was bent over a trunk, pulling things out as he did so however the way the material of his trousers stretched against his thick thighs and ass mesmerised the confused guitarist as he strummed absentmindedly. McCartney quickly pulled him back from his thoughts by coming back up from his position with his bass in hand "Found it you cheeky bastards!" Paul laughed as he stood up,practically strutting toward him before setting up to record.

———

"Ringo love what the fuck are you starin a' eh?" John asked, for such inappropriate language it was said with such love laced in between each word. It was a valid question however as the drummer was sat on the sofa staring quite intensely at Lennon.

"Nothin much really your just very handsome" Ringo seemed to know how to make John blush, said blush only getting worse when Paul walked into the room and planted a kiss against his cheek.

Every bit of affection was a risk and yet that seemed to be one of the main reasons Paul and Ringo's stolen kisses for John filled him with such exhilaration.

"Yeah I think the nest you call head of hair is lookin proper unhinged today" George put in his piece once more to remind the trio he was still there.

"Oh George you'll make me blush!" John exclaimed with a joking tone as he fanned himself cool, Paul giggling against his chest as Ringo shot him quite an amused look.

The thought of John being all flustered did seem appealing to George in some way, seeing him get all worked up by a compliment; of course the fake compliment he gave was nothing to swoon over but the idea of saying something so genuine you could see the love pooling in John's eyes was enough to make George internally swoon for the most fleeting of seconds.

It would just be in secret...no body would know; George seemed to internally have this debate with himself on a daily basis. The fact the debate had even come into question proved to the guitarist that he clearly needed to review some of his opinions on life. There was still one main contributor to his lack of trying; fear.

————

"You know George I haven't seen you with a bird in a few weeks" Ringo made the observation George prayed he wouldn't make as they sat on break in the studio. The drummer seemed to try and read every part of the guitarist after speaking.

"Well Ringo I cant exactly find two b-girlfriends...I'm not you" George jeered back at Ringo with a small pang of jealousy. It was beginning to be apparent to the two men in conversation that there was an underlying issue occurring.

The way Ringo looked at him earnestly was enough to make George melt; he couldn't deny the fact that he craved this sort of gaze as much as he hated to admit it to himself. However as long as he never exhibited any of it out loud he would be perfectly fine.

———

George's thoughts were beginning to keep him awake at night, staring blankly at the ceiling with a dazed expression of sheer confusion as his brain tries to navigate through the mine field that was his ever-conflicted thoughts.

The continued looks and insinuations from the rest of the band after George admitted to himself he enjoyed it seemed to threaten to tip him over the edge.

Not only that but since the start of the trios relationship Ringo had begun taking the bathroom shortcut to Paul and Johns room whenever they stayed in a hotel. Whilst they snuggled against each other in one room, George was left longing and lonely in his unusually cold bed.

———  
There was most definitely a breaking point for the poor young guitarist.

One day whilst Ringo and Paul were out trying to get some time outside, a difficult thing to do in Europe where they were so heavily adored. George and John sat twiddling their thumbs in the hotel room.

That was until John walked over to George in almost a sulking fashion, kneeling in front of him and grabbing hold of his hand. "My dear I'm ever so bored!!" He joker in a funny accent.

The moment between that and the next seemed to last a lifetime for them, they locked eyes and regardless of Johns joke he still managed to convey that this affection did seem to fluster him too.

This moment ended however in when George's ever contained frustration spilled out in cascading tears; the guitarist bursting into sudden tears at the notion of John so much as holding his hand.

"George what's wrong mate?" John grew concerned as the guitarist was unable to contain his emotion. He could see he was in desperate need of a hug and yet still tried to heavily restrict himself as he shook with sobs.

"C'mere you daft git" John spoke before jumping into George's arms, giving George the opportunity to grab hold of him as he was pinned beneath him. They seemed to be holding onto each-other for dear life as George cried. 

"I think I'm a queer John" George choked out as John hugged against his chest, John realised how careful he had to be in that moment; this was most likely the first time George had even admitted that out loud to himself let alone another person. It was his most vulnerable point of make or break and John had to make sure that his words would make him not break him.

"That's ok George, it's not like me and my two fairies are gonna judge ya eh?" John tried to crack a joke about his two boyfriends in efforts to give the young guitarist some type of built up support system; show him he wouldn't have to deal with his societal struggles and strife alone. 

The two stayed there without a word for many moments, they felt a warm buzz at the light feather touch of their desperate embrace; empathetic tears of John staining small puddle against George's pj shirt.

Both of them wanted to ask and tell how they felt. George wanted to express who had made him realise he was not only a homosexual but one that liked ogling at his actual attracted gender. John wanted to ask if George had come to realise his sexuality due to a growing crush on the rest of the very much affectionate band. Their answers would fit hand in hand but neither thought that moment were the time or place to have such a discussion.

Before any further discussion could be had Paul and Ringo re entered the house to find the two snuggles against each other. "And to think I was the one who was gonna stay home! I could've been having George cuddles!!" Ringo exclaimed he dropped his shopping bags in fake shock.

"George you don't usually hug unless someone gives you one and no one wants to push your boundary unless you really need it yknow..are you...are you okay?" Paul trailed on and on about George's regular behaviour before sitting beside the snuggling guitarists. 

"I'm like you guys" George found it very difficult to get the words out again as he had before but he needed to tell Paul and Ringo so he tried to make enough insinuation to the point where those stinging words wouldn't have to graze his tongue.

"I like um...I...Ive been thinking about" George tried to put his thoughts into words as he wasn't fully accepting of himself in that moment however he was accepting enough to the level where he'd want to tell the guys. He recalled the conversation that seemed to start the whole inner conflict in his mind that also seemed to be a catalyst for the trios new found love.

"I think Elvis is proper fit" he recalled the conversation which they all slipped and ended up accidentally revealing how besotted they were with the king of rock.

"So what are you saying Hazza...your into men?" Paul tried his best to remain a positive environment for the guitarist who's calmed demeanour was instead replaced by a shaking nervous mess. 

George couldn't even stand to confirm Paul's question out loud, he instead nodded furiously whilst fresh tears threatened to spill.

The moment after was almost instantaneous,Paul and Ringo rushed to either side of the cuddling pair to lay as closely as they could so that they could provide as much support as possible; trying to make George feel accepted and loved.

It was a weird situation four scouser men pulled in a tight emotional embrace; it’s something you wouldn’t even see platonically so the foreign feeling of the warm affection still lingered as they held tight to each other.

George may not have been one hundred percent with himself, but at least he no longer had to face his troubles alone.


	7. It’ll take time but it will happen.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Each member takes time to guide George through the he stepping stones of affection in a way that makes him comfortable and included.

Once the large and un-communicated group hug had taken place all four of them no matter how much they hated such deep talks realised they had to have some sort of in depth conversation.

"So what do you want to happen now George?" Paul was the first to pull away and initiate the conversation; everyone grumbled slightly as they got up however the grumbling could be pinned down more as social confusion; none of them knew just how to cope with the situation. 

"I...I want to..try...but I can't" George paused between his words as his eyes switched between Paul's eyes and Paul's luscious lips. Paul flashed him a knowing smile and took hold of his hands.

"That's perfectly okay George...hows this?" Paul asked before planting soft kisses on each of George's hands like a gentlemen; a guilty blush was spreading across the guitarists face as he tried to squash his ever persistent fear and detest, trying to combat it by admiring just how dreamy Paul actually was.

"That's..."George scrambled for the right words as the bassist still held onto his hand quite tenderly; a look of warmth conveyed between the pair. "That's actually quite nice" he found it difficult to admit but the affection did send a thrill of fire through his veins. His eyes lighting up as he tried to squash the feeling of shame and fear.

"May I?" Ringo took the hand Paul had left into his hand. The drummer didn't want to push George too much but he was ever so desperate to just kiss the conflicted lad.

George nodded and Ringo gently kissed the top of his hand, the sensation sending a rush and thrill down George's spine. Ringo himself trying not to collapse under the ecstasy.

"Unless you want a kiss from me I won't ask you for one Geo...we've already had our cuddle anyways" John winked at George before walking away; George secretly glad that John hadn't decided to push his boundary.

—-  
There was some men droning about some news on the television set and whilst George and John sat side by side on the sofa bored out of their minds, Johns hand edged closer to George's. "Can I hold your hand George?" Lennon asked very politely as he brushed the tips of his fingers against George's.

"Yes" George replied, his voice still had that echo of anxiety as his hand was gently held. They went back to watching the television with their hands intertwined; smiles secretly spreading across their faces.

——

Paul and John loved to cuddle, Ringo also liked cuddling but John and Paul would find absolutely any given opportunity in private to cuddle. One day in particular George's seemed to be eyeing up the pair as they lay in embrace. "Want to squeeze in the middle Georgie?" Paul asked as he pulled himself slightly from Johns warm arms. 

George eagerly walked over to lay between the pair as they began to hug round him. Him being in the middle meant he wouldn't have to provide much affection which was still quite difficult on his part.

"Your all cuddlin an you didn't ask me?!" Ringo exclaimed as he came in.

"Well Ringo you come lay where I am and I'll just lay on top of you" George suggested. It was a very bold move for George put forward considering even holding hands could make him quite squeamish at times but everyone knew better than to question it as Ringo snuggled in between Paul and John; George doing exactly as he said and laying against Ringo's chest.

This seemed to be a moment of change for George because as he lay against Ringo he heard the way his heart beat in his chest, he felt the soft way in which Paul and John would tub circles into his back. The guitarist was in a sudden moment of relaxation to the point where society was nothing but a silly old word.

A knock at the door unfortunately pulled them all right back into the real world as George jumped up in extreme haste trying to deny the best he could how much he just enjoyed snuggling against Ringo.

———-

The turning point for George was when he and Paul sat relaxing in the hotel room, Ringo and John both equally finding stupid ways to style their useless mop tops in the next room over.

George looked over to Paul who has his eyes fixed on the daily paper, due to the recent outbreaks of beatlemania in UK they couldn't actually experience life as much as they wanted; instead living through the news.

His eyes drifted down to Paul's pretty lips, he couldn't stop staring at them and he didn't quite realise how obvious he was being until Paul looked up and smiled, the movement of his lips being the only thing snapping George from his admiration.

"Paul...can I...can I kiss you?" George asked very bashfully as he struggled to make eye contact with the bassist. Paul smiled and took George's hands in his.

"It's all up to you, my lips are available for kisses love" Paul stated, trying to make it very clear to George that he wouldn't do anything he didn't want him to.

George brought his hands up to hold either side of Paul's face, edging in painfully slow but in his eyes way too fast. Wincing slightly at Paul's hot breath on his skin and biting down and swallowing every urge to panic or run off. They're eyes closed as their lips met in a soft and hasty kiss. What only lasted a couple of seconds felt like an eternity to the pair as they met in the bold forwarding of George's affections.

As George pulled away and gazed at Paul's love-ridden face, as if by pure instinct, went back in and captured Paul in a slightly longer kiss. Panic shooting round his body as he cherished Paul's lips the same way he would cherish a woman's. 

The second time they pulled away they both smiled widely at each other. "You ok George?" Paul made sure George was ok because the fact he went back in was quite a monumental moment and the bassist wanted to make sure George wasn’t in the brink of an anxiety fuelled collapse.

“You know what Paul...in my mind I could be better...but what I just felt with you then...was amazing” George spoke, a smile still on his face as he tried to hold back tears, said tears being a mix of panic and pure bliss.

“I’m glad George..I’m really proud of you love” Paul smiled as he held onto George’s hand, something he’d usually have to negotiate before hand; smiling further when the guitarist didn’t recoil away.

It was the little steps that counted but those larger steps taken by George in those fleeting moments of bold affection were enough to start them on a more stable path to a functioning relationship...as functioning as it could be within the privacy of their walls.


	8. Barricaded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (TW: mentions of injury)
> 
> An unfortunate situation in the Beatles hotel room leads to George making quite a euphoric discovery.

With 1964 and the beatlemania only becoming more rampant among the world, the Beatles themselves hadn't actually defined their relationship. George being the only undecided party who seemed to shut down whenever the subject was mentioned. A close call with fans however seems to put his mind in a different perspective.

——-

"Who keeps ringin?" John asked as he walked into the hotel room the rest of the Beatles had started chatting in. The phone ringing defiantly over all the conversation until someone picked it up.

"Boys lock and barricade the doors there's fans rushing up the stairs...stay away from the windows"Brian's voice sounded urgent over the phone.Paul ,who had the phone to his ear, relayed Brian's message before putting the phone down, Ringo and George rushing to barricade the door whilst John shut the curtains.

They knew that deep down fans were good natured...but in numbers and in such a small room there was way too much chance for danger. As much danger as John put himself in as he tried to run over to where the rest of the Beatles huddled in the corner, falling and creating quite a gash as a loose screw on the bed scraped along his thigh.

He couldn't scream because god forbid a horde of fan girls were on their floor, instead John held his mouth closed. Yet as he tried to maintain his tough facade, tears started to pour aggressively down his cheeks.

George was the closest to him and so took the closest bit of fabric he could find (a pillow cover) and pressed it to the Lennon's wound. He looked John in the eyes as he continued to silently cry before pulling him in against his chest, the fabric of George's PJ's providing enough muffle for John to sob audibly against him as he tried to ignore the stinging of his leg and the blood that soaked its way through the pillow case.

Paul moved closer to the embracing pair as he reached John he tried to motion for the man to show him his leg, trying to evaluate the situation.

As John pulled away from George tears still cascading down his cheeks, Paul could see through the ripped fabric that the injury would definitely need stitches, John grasping onto George for support as Paul accidentally brushed his hand over the wound in attempts to inspect it.

"Ringo call Brian" Paul tried to whisper across to the drummer, who quickly understood and went to scramble as quietly as he could to the phone each spin sending a noise across the room. 

The conversation however didn't last long and ended with Ringo slamming the phone down in defeat "he says if it's not on the thigh that's lethal just apply some pressure and stay quiet it's too crowded to get any help up" Ringo stated with clear annoyance dripping from his words. 

"George love can you stay holding me?" John said the first words since he'd fallen, prompting a slightly startled George to nod; trying to process being called love and yet not trying to make a big deal due to the situation at hand.

"Me and Ringo will keep the pressure Johnny" Paul beckoned Ringo over before planting a kiss on Johns tear stained cheek, beginning to press down on the wound along with Ringo.

——-

They weren't sure how long they'd been stuck like that, more to the point, John wasn't sure just how long he'd been sat on the floor in searing pain.

That was until the phone rang through the room, Ringo rushing to answer as not to alert any close by lurking fans. "Oh hello again Ringo, It's been about three hours but I think we cleared everyone out...we're sending up some first aid for John now" Brian assured before the two finished the conversation.

——

"Feeling okay John?" George asked as he helped the other guitarist into bed, John wincing as he did so due to the still remaining pain working its way through his leg. 

"Doing just fine Geo" John laughed slightly trying to mask his pain; as if he was trying to make up for all the vulnerability he displayed earlier in the day. He tended to do that a lot, it seemed to be the sort of bursts of emotion that guilted him the most and pushed him back to the public facade he put on for the all the screaming girls.

"Earlier on...you called me..love?" The interaction had been replaying in George's mind ever since it happened; John tensed up as this was very much raking up all the vulnerability he'd rather forget. Yet John knew that to be able to talk about the subject with George was a rare occurrence so he put his issues aside for the time being.

"Yeah...you don't mind do ya George...cause... I do love you" John pushed through his own insecurities and feared that being so open with George and so upfront may scare him off. Yet George reacted to the declaration with a smile, a barely visible blush painting his cheeks.

"I...I love you to John" George paused for a moment, it was a very big point in his journey. He was so afraid and so vulnerable but for once he realised he wasn't disgusted. He didn't feel nauseous after admitting his love for John, in fact he felt...euphoric?!

With this dizzy optimism George got off the bed and ran through the bathroom to the other connected room. " I love you Paul...you too Ringo oh I love you both !!" George tripped over his words in a giddy excitement to get them all out.

Paul and Ringo's faces suddenly wild with joy upon hearing George's wild declarations, bursting with pride and love all in the same bundle of endorphins. 

"I love you too Georgie!" Paul replied with a beaming glow, rushing up to hug the guitarists as he knew Ringo would run up behind him and he didn't want to hog the youngest member. 

"Me too Geo I love you too!" Ringo laughed as he ran to join Paul and George in their loving embrace.

"Hey ladies as lovely as this declaration is if I get up and run towards you all I may start crying... do you think you can come in here?!" John called out causing the rest of the band to chuckle as they walked through to where he laid in bed.

——

"So George...what do you want?" John as always was the leader, trying to make sure that everything was as communicated as it possibly could be. “Cause Ringo and Paul...they’re my boyfriends if that wasn’t painfully obvious” John chuckled slightly as he gestured to the way they all leant against each other. “If you don’t want to use the word boyfriend cause let’s face it...it’s quite a scary dangerous word...if you want to...you could be our partner?” John tried to make George as welcomed as possible trying to cover all grounds as he spoke.

“I want to be your boyfriend...saying that is quite difficult for me but the sooner I say it the sooner I’ll overcome the rush of fear it gives me...then I can focus on how good it makes me feel” George blushed as he spoke.

“Not in that way ya filthy sod!” Paul slapped Johns arm as he caught the guitarist suggestively smirking at the other guitarists words. “But we would love for you to be our boyfriend Georgie, we can always sit and talk like this whenever and this doesn’t just go for George”, Paul changed his sentence to address the whole group,” if you ever want to talk through things and let out your wants or needs or just to talk we can always do this ok?” Paul said and everyone else nodded.

He took time to plant a kiss on each of their lips as a sort of way to end the meeting, which would seem quite comical from an outside perspective.

——-

Johns mind lingered over Paul’s words “we can always do this” the certainty of it, the blind optimism frightened him. It was unfortunate for John that his way of thinking was either super optimistic or super pessimistic and when he was feeling pessimistic it was always difficult for him to rationalise as he normally would.

Yet as George snuggled against him in an attempted to be close, fast asleep as he relished in his warmth, John couldn’t care less how long he’d have what he did...he was just so grateful to have it.


	9. So close to loosing it all

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A faulty overlooked mistake runs risk of ruining the beautiful budding relationship The Beatles had just started to create

As 'with the Beatles' hit the radio stations, the band were still confined to the small walls of hotel rooms. This didn't bother the band as much as they put out though...as it was the only time they had to relish each other.

——-

"Me and George are gonna sneak down to the food hall, do you want anything?" Ringo asked as they walked down the hallways to their rooms.

"Oh can you get me a croissant?" Paul asked with a beaming smile. The funny idea of the two Beatles trying to sneak behind a buffet bar floating across his mind.

"Okay well me and Paulie are gonna write aren't we Macca?" John turned round to Paul. There were two different tones John would use when talking about the two of them writing. The one he was using usually involved a make out session for as long as they can last before they reach that far too intimate point they don't dare go.

"Lead the way Johnny" John opened the door as the other two Beatles ran off. John pulled Paul in and shut the door before pinning him against the closest wall and attacking his gorgeous lips.

They stayed like that against the wall, hungrily kissing each other with few and far between breaths. John began to line kisses down Paul's neck, the bassist grinding at the leg that had been placed between his in a desperate search for full passion as John littered his body with luxuriously tender kisses. 

"Oh love let's lay down" John pulled away before taking Paul into his arms. The softness in which he placed the bassist down on the bed before savagely ravaging his lips sent a warm thrill of endearment.

"BOYS!" The blissful moment was interrupted with a sudden exclamation. Brian was stood at the door with his mouth agape; it's became clear very quickly that in their blind lust they had forgotten to lock the door.

Their manager came in quickly and shut the door behind him, the two passionate lovers now broken apart in a cocktail of fear and embarrassment.

——-  
"How long has this been going on?" Brian asked as he stood, still partially in disbelief gazing at the two men he was sure were straight as rulers.

"Hard to say really because I started dating Paul first" John spoke, without realising that not everyone had become accustomed with the idea of having three boyfriends.

Brian let johns words process in his brain for a moment before finally connecting the dots. "Paul? George..and Ringo?!" Brian asked, trying to keep his voice down but also firm with a weird type  
of emotion he couldn't quite pin down. Remaining shocked when John nodded his head timidly.

"You two stay here, I'm off to fetch the other two were having a meeting,now!" Brian stormed out of the room with the door practically slamming behind him.  
——-  
Brian was heavily conflicted as he stormed down the halls of the hotel. He was glad the four had found that comfort for each other in spite of the barrier of society. Yet he couldn't stop that majority part in his brain that cared purely for their safety. If someone else had walked in instead of Brian and saw two of the Beatles snogging on a bed chances are it would ruin no only their careers, but their lives. Brian shuddered at the thought and carried on walking.  
———

"So boys...John told me what's going on with you all" Brian addressed the four as they all say on the bed; John and Paul slightly more frightened due to the fact they had been the ones to give it away.

"As you know I have nothing against it...obviously" Brian said very matter of factly as he looked at each of them. "However their cannot be this level of recklessness, it puts you in real danger and I can't have that", Brian braced himself before he spoke again, knowing the next sentence to go past his lips would stir up quite a problem. 

"That's why...outside of professional interviews, performances and public appearances...you will not spend time with eachother, you will stay in different rooms of the hotel and I will not tell you the rooms the others are staying in...You can have one last night together" Brian gave them no room to argue, briskly walking from the room and leaving the Beatles in different stages of shock.

George seemed physically quite numb, outwardly he seemed to be in a different plain of consciousness, he stared blankly into the corner of the room. John was furious about the whole situation, furious with himself and furious with Brian.

Ringo began to cry out of desperation and raw emotion, the seemingly calm Paul walking off to the bathroom. George snapped from his wavered trance and held tight to the sobbing drummer.

John picked up on Paul's strange behaviour, knowing he never wanted to break down if he could help it, he knew Paul would try hide his emotions the best he could. When he entered the bathroom he was met with a frightening sight.

Paul had sunk against the wall with tears staining his face, his breathing was hastened and his sobs sounded hoarse as the poor bassist was trying to hold them back. "Oh Macca love...Paulie sweetheart" John sunk to Paul's level. With the modern knowledge of mental health it could be assumed that Paul was experiencing a panic attack, however at that time John only knew one thing about his lover and it was that he was in pain.

"Hold on to me love squeeze as long as you want, do whatever you need" John tried to scramble his brain for ideas, recognising Paul's situation from a situation he had found himself in more than once as a result of his somewhat 'tragic' childhood. He was going off is best knowledge that, the emotion Paul wanted to get across in that moment was simply too expressive to be shown in a healthy way, manifesting in a panicked cry. 

Paul did as John told him and held tight, burying his face deep in Johns neck as he sobbed loudly against him. Not long after George and Ringo ran to the room, a calmer Ringo now very alarmed to his lovers condition. 

——-

They spent most of the night in silence, letting their actions speak louder than words as they grasped on for some remain of normal. Paul nuzzled against johns chest with his tears still staining his face, George was nuzzled into Ringo who had his head leant against the other side of John. 

To talk would only hurt them all more so they took each other in for as long as they could before they all drifted off to sleep.


	10. A tearful embrace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can the Beatles really be kept apart when they aren’t in the public eye, is it really worth it?

Brian had been keeping them apart for a month, he didn't want to, in fact it was the last thing he wanted to do. As a gay man himself he was glad that the four had found that comfort in each other in face of such adversity. He couldn't however, condone their reckless behaviour. 

The manager dreaded to think what would happen If anyone else would've walked in that day and had caught John and Paul in such an incriminating position. The fear wasn't for their imprisonment, much further, Brian feared for their lives within that moment and couldn't bear to think what possibly could've happened to them.

Their smiles and their joyful antics for public appearances were all well rehearsed facades, the interactions they shared during these exchanges always seemed to carry extra weight as if trying to convey that extra level of longing for one another.

There was one slip up that finally broke Brian's resolve...it was a room change.  
——-  
Ringo was quite sick as a child, left him with quite a few health requirements and no one was quite sure why but he couldn't sleep in a cold room. The window in Ringo's room at the particular hotel they checked in at had a stuck open window with a persistent draft.

So he went to talk to Brian and got a room switch with Paul, he packed up what he thought was all of his things and switched rooms, a small glance shared between the yearning pair as they passed each-other like ships in the night.  
——-  
Paul started going and placing things like his toiletry,his towels and other things round the room, going to put his clothes away and letting out a gasp as he saw a jumper bundled up on the floor, it was a nice quaint cable-knit jumper that had been abandoned on the floor. He recognised it straight away...it was Ringo's.

He swooped the clothing into his arms and took in the smell of Ringo's cologne. He had been trying to suppress his emotions for weeks and weeks, knowing that if he started crying it would snowball into something much more hysterical. However when he was greeted with the warm feeling and smell of Ringo's clothes he couldn't stop himself from collapsing to the floor in a puddle of his own tears, choked sobs escaping his lips as he clung onto the jumper and cried into it.

———

Brian was doing his nightly checks, he mostly did these for security reasons, yet when he got to Paul's room he wasn't greeted by the chipper facade Paul had been putting on, instead he heard a strangled cry come from the other side of the wardrobe. The manager rounded the wardrobe to see Paul sobbing and shaking; a state he had never seen him in ever.

"Paul, Paul are you alright?" Brian tried to talk to the bassist and got no reply, instead just more strangled breathing and painful muffled sobs.  
"Paul you must calm down" Brian demanded, panicked. He had no idea what to do. This was when he caved.  
——  
John had settled down with his own thoughts as he did every night, waiting to knock himself into a catatonic state of depressive thoughts. That was until a certain amount of adrenaline rushed through his body at the sound of someone knocking frantically on the door.

He rushed to the door to see Brian out of breath with a panicked look in his eyes, "Paul he...I can't calm him down"'with Brian's words, Paul's previous episode flashed across his mind. Without even waiting to reply he took off in a sprint to the room he saw Paul go in at the other end of the hall, this bounding noise drawing George and Ringo from their rooms and sending them running down after John. Brian may not have told them where they were all in each room but they weren't stupid. 

John reached the room first, with George and Ringo not too far behind. "Oh Paul, baby" Paul's head whipped up to the sound of Johns voice. "You know what do baby just hold me" John told Paul, repeating what they had done the last time this occurred. 

Paul did as he was told and wrapped his arms tightly around John, squeezing him as if he never wanted to let him go. 

George and Ringo knelt down either side and Paul extended his gripped hug to encompass the two of them. Each of them feeling his pain and desperation just by how hard he was holding them.

Brian stood by and watched, frozen with a mix of shock and sadness. He knew he had to let them be together, for Paul to be like this wasn't healthy and it certainly wasn't worth it.

——-

Once Paul had calmed down, they all sat down on the bed, as they had done before they were separated. "I'm so sorry for going about it in such a harsh way. Please just be careful lock the doors make sure no one sees you because I worry about you all. I'm sorry I'll leave you to do whatever you want right now" Brian spoke his piece and left.

"I'm starting to think he leaves cause he's scared of what we're gonna say" John said as the four of them were left on the bed.


End file.
